Lookin' for laughs or smiles?
Here's your one stop source for Irish wit, wisdom, and humor! Jokes, pictures, proverbs, blessings, and the like florish like the shamrock on the moor. If I feel adventurous, I may post a lyric or two. Here's a couple of jokes to get you started.

----------------------------------------------------
McQuillan walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, he started to leave.

"S'cuse me," said a customer, who was puzzled over what McQuillan had done. "What was that all about?"

"Nothing," he replied, "my wife just sent me out for a jar of olives."

----------------------------------------------------

Barty was trapped in a bog and seemed a goner when Big Mick O'Reilly wandered by.

"Help!" Barty shouted, "Oi'm sinkin'!"

Don't worry," assured Mick. "Next to the Strong Muldoon, Oi'm the strongest man in Erin, and Oi'll pull ye right out o' there."

Mick leaned out and grabbed Barty's hand and pulled and pulled to no avail.

After two more unsuccessful attempts, Mick said to Barty, "Shure, an' Oi can't do it. The Strong Muldoon could do it alone, mebbe, but Oi'll have to get some help."

As Mick was leaving, Barty called "Mick! Mick!

D'ye think it will help if Oi pull me feet out of the stirrups?

Murphy had won the national lottery and he was overjoyed. However, at the presentation ceremony he was greeted by a rather sour-faced official who said:

'Well done, Mr Murphy, you've won six million pounds, but I'm afraid we've a small cash-flow problem. It is impossible for us to pay you all the money at once. So what we intend to do is to give you £2 million this week, £2 million next week and £2 million the week after.'

To hell with that,' roared Murphy, 'I can't be bothered with all the fuss. Give me my pound stake money back and forget it!'

Proverbs and Blessings
As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point in the wrong direction.
----------------------------------------------------
Here's to the old lady up the hill.
If she won't drink it,
I will!

----------------------------------------------------
May the grass grow long on the road to hell for want of use.
----------------------------------------------------
May your troubles be as few and far between
As my grandmother's teeth.

----------------------------------------------------
May you be buried in a casket made from the wood of a 100 year old oak
That I shall plant tomorrow.

----------------------------------------------------
There are only two kinds of people in the world,
The Irish, and those who wish they were.

----------------------------------------------------
Some may say the glass is half empty,
Some may say the glass is half full,
But the Irish will forever say
"Are you gonna drink that?"

----------------------------------------------------
God invented whiskey to keep the Irish from conquering the world!
----------------------------------------------------
May those who love us, love us. As for those who don't, may God turn their hearts. If he can't turn their hearts, may he turn their ankles so we'll know them by their limping

Affiliate Me! Book with 1 2 Travel!